Mar 07

Not Quite How I was Planning My Next Tattoo and #BewbLuv Moves Forward

Posted on March 7, 2013 by lttlewys

Yup, that’s a whole group of #cmgr’s throwin the #HashTag down!!

Soo, a few weeks ago, I headed back to NY… technically I was there for Social Media week and #cmgrUN! And they were awesome! I will be writing about #cmgrUN over on My Community Manager! The trip to NY also, included my check up appointment for my bewbs! Deep Breath

I procrastinated making my appointment, dreaded that call.. it had been almost 60days since I stopped the chemo. My body had almost stopped hating me for injecting all the horrible drugs, my war with food was mostly over and I just needed Dr. AKME to sign off, to give me magical words…

Only, it turns out there are no magical words. Once you have CANCER, you are always at risk, there is no magical phrase that makes it better. I move from patient to survivor. I am not ok with this. There are no good words for any of this. I heard words, like negative, benign, recurrence, chances are… not you are cured, this is over. *sigh*

So, the appointment, went well… I have gained back most of the weight lost thanks to the lovely chemo and eating only scrambled eggs and Ben and Jerry’s for months. They took the blood, did the mammogram and those tests came back ~~benign~~ negative!! WooT! I knew all this, I knew my surgeon did a fantastic job and got all the visible cancer. And, she even managed to keep the scars loverly and non-visible! Dr. AKME admired her work and even mentioned how symmetrical the girls are. I know, all superficial but for me, that was good to hear after months of looking at my Chemo ravaged body!!! Did you see, I even haz hair!!!

Special thanks, to Jay Bryant for this amazing pic!!

Now, what’s next… Radiation!! For a whole 24hours, I thought I wasn’t going to have to do this, I thought, I was done. Only, I was a bit premature in this thinking. With my type of cancer, my diagnosis and my age… radiation is a must!! Why? Coz, of my age, coz of the type of cancer! Upside….

The radiation offices have this

How can you dislike a Dr. office that has this!!

I was in awe and shock after walking into the offices buried deep down in the Financial District, after the horrors of my mammogram ( that is a whole nother story) I was leery and a little bit bitter when I arrived. However, the staff… AMAZING, the offices, GORGEOUS, my new Dr. and Tech, there are no words!! And, y’all know me, I am not frequently speechless. I’m going to call new Dr, Dr. RAD… she sat me down, laid it out for me. She told me I wasn’t special. The statistics of recurrence not in my favor. I needed to start radiation. Good news, I don’t have to have much and the side-effects are minimal. In fact, only 33 days. Not such a random number, it’s every day for 10min. And, they get me there. They go above and beyond to make you comfortable, to make the experience painless and completely tailored to you. It’s all about the patient!!

This was waiting for me, it was soft & comfy and perfect!!

So much so, they were able to do the initial set up while I was there. Dr. RAD sent me off for coffee and when I came back, the Tech was able to get me in, take pics, give me my tattoos! Yup, I was put into this machine, I was x-ray’d and tattooed*! They are goin to focus the radiation where Morte was and then my lymph nodes where minute cancerous cells were found! This will, hopefully, prevent recurrence!!

Two itty bitty tattoo dots where the radiation rays will focus!!

MRI machine, this will help them focus radiation

So… this week, I will be in Austin attending #SXSWi with @Nestivity and @Rawporter! Next week, I will be starting a different gig, ya more about that later!! While, I am looking for a place to live in NY starting the first of April.

*This was not how or where, I was planning on getting my second tattoo! However, they do look like freckles and I haz those, so I’m not going to count these, I have decided!! So, I am still planning for my 2nd tattoo!

Posted in bewbluv, Breast Cancer, Business, Cancer, Community, Conferences, Friends, Me, travel | Tagged #cmgrUN, #smw13, New York | Leave a comment

Mar 04

Clients, Apps and a New Town…Crazy Week Ahead!!

Posted on March 4, 2013 by lttlewys

I’m in Austin. Yea, that’s Austin, Texas. I know, I know, what in the world? Well, I have an amazing friend and he offered me a place to crash and next week, Austin will be once again hosting the biggest interactive conference of the year. So, it would seem fortuitous that I happen to be here!

Austin in the Morning!!

I have been combing the #SXSW & #SXSWi hashtags for the last couple of weeks, to see who is going to be heading into town, which start ups are going to launch here! It’s quite the list I have!!

This year, I will be working with two different companies! What does that mean? Well, let me share with you the two companies…

Rawporter. A fairly new company that had the foresight to see where social and #citizenjournalism are colliding and have created a way for the two to merge. Rawporter is a way for you to share your pictures & videos and have them be watermarked and protected for you!! This means no more ~~stealing~~ borrowing of your pictures from Twitter or Facebook( which is illegal)!! Even better, your pictures can be purchased!! Flipside, looking for a particular picture? Do a quick search and find what you are looking for, purchase and easy peasy!! Pictures can be verified within the apps geo-location settings! Sounds cool, rite? It is! I spent quite a bit of time with the co-counders, Rob & Kevin and they are pretty awesomesauce!! Currently, looking for funding, they have brought me on to help with their Social and Marketing. Look in a few weeks as we implement an amazing intern program!! We, also, have some fun things planned here in Austin as the whole team is headed in!!

My second client, Nestivity (make sure you click over and reserve your name)! A very cool new tool, coming out!! It will create “Nests” within your community and give you a clear, easier path to connect, engage and respond to people in your nests!! They are doing a webcast, March 5th, pre- SXSWi and will be showing demos! I’m pretty excited about this, and looking forward to sharing all about them while in Austin!!

As usual with conference prep, I have checked with people coming in, set up my calendar and checked my favourite apps. This year, in addition to foursquare, I will be using Trendr! I fully admit, Linkedin is my weakest link and also, an incredibly powerful tool that I underutilize. Trendr, will use my Li account and notify me of people that are close and then offer to connect us, OFFLINE!! Really awesome, rite? Trendr is currently working a Global campaign called #Meet2013! Check it out, download the app and meet away!!

Okay, so the apps, I have….

I have a plan and a strategy and the biggest thing I will be total flexible. I think that is the key to being at #SXSWi, being flexible. I am really looking forward to being there with my Rawporter Team and the team from Nestivity!!

Which apps are you using?

Posted in Blogging, Business, Community, Conferences, customer service, Friends, Social Media, start up | Tagged Austin, sxsw, SXSWi | 2 Comments

Jan 31

Job Hunting, Resume Not Needed

Posted on January 31, 2013 by lttlewys

I popped into #Tchat last nite as I’m wont to do, it’s a great chat with an amazing community, hosted by a wonderful friend!! The tweet that caught my eye was about paper resumes and job hunting. Well, I’m job hunting and not doing a traditional resume!!

Turns out I’m not alone, Vala Afshar is seeking a marketer and he is solely using Twitter to get his applicants, I don’t know if he is going to be requiring a paper resume later on, I do know he is going to blog about his method and findings and I am curious to see what the end result is…. I really like this method.

This is “Old School” found @Offsite in NY

This may not work for everyone or even every business, traditional methods may still work. Only, I am no longer traditional and neither are many of my cohorts! We are starting to see this more and more, however it is still so new that most people are perplexed by the idea of a new digital resume.

In chatting with a friend, we have discussed this, labeling it “Digital Footprint” My resume is completely online and easily found with several platforms that allow me to group everything together!! Check out my About.Me or my Twylah page…there you find my twitter, Facebook, blog and even my LinkedIn. My reputation, my influence and my capabilities can all be found, weighted and measured with just a few clicks and waves of your mouse!!

However, I think it’s a little easier than that… Everyone acknowledges the different platforms, each platform needs to treat each Community & Audience differently. Your use of each platform and your presence there should fit the needs of your brand, YOU, what your message is, level of engagement and interaction. Keep in mind, we are talking only digital persona, a single dimension, the REAL person you can’t really get to know without some face time!! That being said… For most people, you can really get a good indepth glimpse of someone by completing the “Social Trifecta”

Borrowed from GrowMap.com

Sounds like some sort of Mob hit, rite?? Nah… easy enough, we know most people are on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. Looking at those three platforms as follows:

Twitter- conversations, sharing content, in-depth discussions via various TwitterChats (List of my favs)
Facebook- Sharing pictures, family and funnies, share content, keeping up with friends and family personal accomplishments & happenings
LinkedIn-Professional accomplishments, share content, online resume

Generally, by connecting with a person on all three platforms, you will get a very good idea of who a person is, learn about the dynamics that makes up their Social Footprint. Granted, we all use Social differently and this theory works for most people but not all. You are going to get that person that shares the same thing, at the same time across all three platforms or the person who keeps personal completely offline. Spend some time, learn what you can on those platforms.

I digress, back to the paper resume, we are in a Digital World, companies are in transition learning that hiring people for their skillz isn’t the best thing, hire for fit and train. You want your company to be Social, internally and externally, look in the space where people are being successful at being and doing social, choose from that sandbox. For me, I’m a Social Gurl and surviving in the Digital World.

Posted in Blogging, Business, Community, marketing, Me, Social Media, twitter | Tagged #social, #tchat, facebook, LinkedIn, twitter, TwitterChats | Leave a comment

Jan 15

The End of #BewbLuv… Sorta

Posted on January 15, 2013 by lttlewys

As promised, here is the down, dirty and ugly of the last several months!! Once in NY and finally getting into a treatment program, new doctor and restarting Chemo. It all went pretty fast. By fast, I mean, I consistently got sicker and sicker!!

The Dr. in NY, I’ll call her Dr. Almost Killed Me but Didn’t Mean It or Dr. AkMe for short was brillz!! I went from the not going to help you at all hospital to the amazing wonderful Ralph Lauren Breast Cancer Center! Where everyone was nice, remembered me, bent over backwards to help or even just empathize while not being pitying or condescending!!

Dr. AkMe changed up my treatments a little, I was originally scheduled for 2 differ chemo treatments( that means 4 injections of 2 different types of medicines) over 4mos and she finished the first treatment with no changes, she changed the second treatment a little to accommodate for my health. See, I totally, am an over achiever, I really rocked all the side affects of chemo!! YEA ME! That meant, I was sick as a dog, well, actually sicker…. Treatment was fast-tracked ( That was my bright idea, I don’t recommend it) So, I went to treatment every other week with blood work every week. I steadily lost 5lbs each week, a concern for Dr. AkMe not so much for me. It was only at the end, when you could count my ribs that the loosing weight became an issue. My immune system consistently crashed. That was to be expected and once again I felt the need to over achieve and made sure mine barely registered!! *sigh* I was consistently fighting not only keeping any food down but also, dehydration. Then the fight, got harder…

The second round of chemo was meant to attack my bone marrow and sure as sh*t, it totally did, so while I had finally stopped throwing up ALL the time, now I was dealing with excruciating pain in my joints and bones! Fortunately, Dr. AkMe anticipated this (she is really smart) and upped my pain meds. During all this, I was pretty much on lock-down except for the horrifying Cab rides to treatment!! By the way, Cabbies totally stop FAST when you tell them you have to throw up!!

I realize now, I can throw in my quirky sense of humour and even smile. However, at that time… not only was I struggling with being so incredibly, physically sick…. it ( the Chemo, being Sick) had started to affect my mind, my spirit. I struggled on a daily basis with memory loss, crying jags and the occasional temper tantrum. I was consistently forgetting things, conversations and since I basically slept 20hours a day I was up at odd hours. Not to mention, I was pretty much confined to bed, since I was totally doped on pain meds or nauseous or just plain to weak!! I really didn’t want to talk to people at all.

I know and felt all the concern from all of you, your thoughts and your respectfulness of trying to find out how to help without overstepping and THANK YOU!! I am humbled, honoured and overwhelmed with all of you. Altho, during those dark months, I was consistently angry and bitter at you. I didn’t want to share any of that with you, not until it was ME and not the DRUGS. Yes, I was on so much medication that I wasn’t sure anymore what was Sparkly me and what was Hideous me. I resented your health, your happy lives and how things moved forward for you while I was stuck, consumed with Doctors, drugs and the failings of my body & mind! I wrestled with feelings of shame, remorse and bitterness constantly. And, let’s not forget the WHINING! I was so disgusted with myself, my body and my lack of being able to see the end, So much so, that I walked away from everyone.

After the last treatment, I left NY. I needed a warmer place where I wouldn’t be tempted to go out and socialize once I started to feel better ( We all know that I totally would have, too). I needed to get my head back. I didn’t wanted to leave at all, leaving felt like failure. It was necessary, I wasn’t in a good place and I was completely unemployed and living on my savings. And, go figure, Cancer is freakin’ expensive!! Even with all the help from Ralph Lauren.

I was struggling with who I am, trying to figure out what I wanted to do and reconcille myself to the lost period. I needed first to sleep for weeks and work the rest of the drugs out of my system. I did that. I managed to end my war with food and start eating again. Some foods still make me nauseous, others don’t taste right and some I just find icky. But, we are happy together again! And, Hullo COFFEE!! That’s right, I was off coffee. That was most sad.

I wasn’t ready to share my story. I wasn’t ready to see where you are with your lives. I wasn’t ready to make any decisions. Now, I am ready to share my story. I am loving where all your lives have taken you. The decisions are still hard. I still get angry. I still have gaps in my memory or can’t remember something I know, I know. And, basically, all of my plans, hopes and wants have changed and I don’t know who I am. The Cancer & treatment, took over my life, me. I fought it and denied it but it did anyways. Saving my Bewbs became all consuming, so much so it became who I am. I don’t want to be that person. I will always be a Cancer survivor, in fact, last year will become a defining year in my life. Only, instead of Breast Cancer defining me, I am going define its role in my life. I am going to continue to write about it, support those who need it and advocate for foundations that are supporting this community of brave women and their families!

Lucky for me, I am well loved. Not only am I loved but I am loved by extraordinary people. These people, my friends, most I consider my family, know ME. They are stepping up and showing me who I am, that I am ok and holding my hand while I dip my toes back into the world of the living. Well, I was dipping my toes then just decided to dive right back in by attending #NMX and #CES!!

What’s next?? Several things… I am job hunting, looking for a community management role somewhere. I go back to Dr. AkMe for a check up. I probably don’t need any more treatment but may need to take medication for the next few years to prevent the Cancer from coming back. I will be heading back to New York. I am back partnering with Tim McDonald and MyCommunityManager, producing our #cmgrUN conference series for 2013. I am also, working with Sam Fiorella and Danny Brown with their new book Influence Marketing launch/tour in May!!

If you need a quick catch up… go here and here!!

Posted in bewbluv, Breast Cancer, Business, Cancer, Community, Family, Friends, Me | 31 Comments

Jan 14

Getting My Social Back via #NMX

Posted on January 14, 2013 by lttlewys

Soooo, what’s a girl to do when wavering about getting back into something that was a passion and is no longer??? She attends #NMX, of course!!!

I completely and utterly shocked several people, after being offline for the last several months (I’ll tell you bout that later)!! Frankly, I shocked myself, I had no intention of attending #NMX. I am thinking I owe Sam a very huge Thank You!! I have been slowly working my way back online, wavering back and forth as to whether I wanted to commit or switch careers. I just wasn’t feeling passionate or interested in being Social or being in the SocialVerse.

Totally crazy and amazing!!! If you are ever doubting what you do, what you love or are passionate about…. go hang out with people that share your passion!! Find those people that are excited and just enjoy the conversation, energy and creativity flowing around you!!

This year, was my second #NMX and was soo much better then before. I’ve been trying to figure out why. It’s possible that I have changed so much from last year, this year, I was definitely a lot lost or perhaps, it was the people… I met so many new people!! Yes, many that were there speaking or attending, I knew and had met, talked to, shared meals with and were happy to connect again!! Yet, so many, I hadn’t met, had no idea who they were and whoa, did I make some amazing connects!!!

Happy Girl with @samfiorella, @Milaspage & @tinu

As what normally happens at a Social Conference, I didn’t make a lot of sessions!! Each morning, I went through the schedule and chose sessions from topic or speaker and tried to make those. There weren’t a lot of sessions that I wanted to sit in on based on the topic, but the speakers… there were several!! Most I had not seen speak before and was excited about that and then there were my favs that I love hearing speak. Even doing that, I only made it to couple of sessions!! Mostly coz I got drawn into some amazing conversations, meeting people…

That then led to small and intimate dinners or meandering down, err up? to Starbucks to gather some more details!! Luv that, I still made it to the networking events, but always had meals with four or five people!! It was these little intimate dinners/coffees that not only was biz discussed but interests and sense of humour quirks really came out!! I even spent an amazing dinner with Diane and Steve Brogan from Mom Pop Wow!!

The amazing @Hashtracking making sure I am hashtagging #NMX!!

Jure & I with his newly acquired “Wilson”from @Readz!!

Amazing Readz Party with Anne Weiskopf, Sam Fiorella, Jen, Phil Hollows

I totally borrowed all these pics!! I discovered that I really didn’t take that many, except this really cool one of Wine!! Thanks, Readz for hosting such a great event and Anne, my new Bestie, for dragging me along!!

Posted in Uncategorized | 13 Comments

Aug 27

Help Needed, Please Don’t Apply

Posted on August 27, 2012 by lttlewys

I have been putting off this post, well, actually, I’ve written it out a few different times and in a few different ways and it never sounded right, never felt right. I have finally just decided it’s never going to sound or feel right.

I started chemo again, after a very long and complicated break, with much thanks and some amazing wonderful people, I was able to get into the right program (I’m unisured, remember) and start my chemo again. And, damn, if it didn’t just kick my ass and throw me down. It was horrible and tomorrow, I go again. I can’t even tell you how much I am dreading it. Each time, I think I’m ready for the drugs, that I am prepared, I’m not.

Sadly, I wish, the drugs were my only obstacle. The reason, I have not shared or been open. I have been hiding. Hiding my shame, my anger and my bitter disappointment. In myself. Shame, that I’m not coping well with this last round of chemo, anger that my body, the meds are destroying everything. Hiding while I try to figure who I am, what I am doing. Disappointment is a funny thing, it becomes harsher as it’s directed at ourselves and our internal voices perceive it so largely the negative vibes can no longer be shaken off.

I never wanted to be consumed by my treatments, have my health and medical take the drivers seat in my life, yet, that is exactly what happened. I realize that I am lucky, that this won’t last forever… In fact, I have one last treatment of the Red Devil and then I switch treatments and will be done with chemo mid-November!! Woot, rite?

Yes, that is a good thing. Only, I am struggling. Struggling with what the drugs are doing to me, the ironies of the medicine that is supposed to be healing me, is slowly eating away at my mind, stealing what health my body had and is carving into the person that I am and turning me into someone I don’t know. I don’t know who I am anymore.

That is more frightening to me then the Cancer ever was. It’s not about having “Chemo Brain” and forgetting milk at the store or lunch with a friend, it’s not about throwing up in the nearest trash can on 6th Ave or Central Park or in the Subway station ( actually, not as bad as it sounds, NY has lots of trash cans), it’s not even the fact that I “forget”to temper my tongue and speak my mind before I filter it. I struggle with everyday things, with what my body tells me versus what my mind wants to do. I can no longer tell what is the drugs and what is me. I fight with myself constantly, pushing harder and then giving in. Tamping down feelings and temper tantrums, only to have a single outburst over a silly thing and crying jags.

It’s a lot, I’m going through a lot. My mind acknowledges this. My body hates it. I despise it. There is a lot of confusion in my head and a lot of screaming (as one’s inner voice can only do)!! There is no shame in my weakness, yet I am overwhelmed with it. I turn down offers of help, not because I don’t appreciate them but because I don’t know what to do with them, I don’t know how to ask for what I am looking for… I don’t know!! Yea, that’s a lot of I don’t knows coz guess what… I don’t know and that is agonizing for me.

It is no longer enough to talk with my friends, to turn to twitter for amusement and cheering up. I feel myself withdrawing, spending more time in my head and that is not a good thing. I am spinning in this never ending tilt-a-whirl that is full of sickness and confusion.

Now, before, y’all get your knickers in a bunch and start in on me… I have already come to the conclusion that it’s time for help. I’m crazy and while I occasionally do stupid things, I’m not dumb. I, also, know it’s going to take some time to get my groove back and become balanced. That forevermore, my life is changed and change is good. Even though currently, the changes are bleak and dismal.

I don’t know what is going to happen over the next few days, since I have chemo in the morning and I’m ok with that I’m well stocked in Jello and sprite (Both of which, I really, really don’t like) Hmmmm, I wonder if I could find someone to make me some Jello Jigglers maybe that would make it more palatable!!

Soo much fun!!

Posted in bewbluv, Breast Cancer, Cancer, Community, Friends, Me | Tagged breast cancer, cancer, help | 26 Comments

Aug 23

Success…. Bittersweet and Awesome: A Mother’s Quandry

Posted on August 23, 2012 by lttlewys

Today is a day a lot of us will be experiencing over the next few weeks, that oft celebrated and bemoaned day of the year!! The First Day of School!!

This is one of my last firsts that I will have, my youngest is starting the first day of 8th grade!! Kinda a big first. I’m not there, I’m not there taking the requisite first day of school picture that I have taken every year for both kids. I’m not there giving hugs, checking a back pak, signing emergency forms or even taking that deep breath as my baby starts a new journey that will take him a little further away from me.

As a parent, as a mother my biggest goal with my raising my children, teach them to think. Sounds funny, right? But it’s true, as a parent, all I want for my kids is to be happy, not to worry about what others thought. I wanted to instill in them they have the choices, they need to make them, I can’t make those choices for them, I don’t know what will make them happy only they can determine that. Ohhh, trust me, I have bitten my tongue many a time through the years, lately more then ever.Watched as they made choices that would take them down a harder life path, watched as they chose to forage a rougher path. Even as I hurt and ached for them, I proudly watched as each in their own way, they learned who they were and what they believed in and then stood strong. They are both still very young and have so much to learn, see and grow. Personally, I think they have started out really well and even though their paths have taken them further away from me this year, I am ready if they need me.

While watching as both of my kids have made choices that have taken them on paths that are vastly independent of me. And I am so very proud. As much as I have spent questioning my parenting skillz and anguished over raising them, it would appear that I have taught them to think for themselves, to colour outside the lines and forage their own paths!!

The Elusive Teen & Sunshine

The Elusive Teen and Sunshine have returned to Cali after an amazing time in NY!! They decided they needed West Coast Sunshine instead of New York hustle and bustle!! Soooo very proud of them, even if I wanted them to stay.

And, for the first time in over 12 years I am missing a first. The first day of 8th grade for my son. He has chosen to spend this year in the mid-west. While, I am a little sad about this, I am also, really proud of him.

Adorbs, rite?

My parenting job isn’t done, far from it, it has just shifted and like all relationships, needs to grow and change. It’s not time to bemoan they are no longer babies but young peoples and celebrate those peoples and embrace who they are becoming. I love who they are and even though I don’t always like their choices, I am eagerly watching them. Err, ok, some of them I’m cringing but still… I wanted to raise strong, independent thinkers and it would appear that I have. *sigh* I love them both with all my heart and while this particular success is bittersweet, it’s what I have!!

Posted in Blogging, Family, Kids, Me, Parenting | Tagged Family, Kids, parenting | 1 Comment

Jul 06

Not So Easy, Being Bald!!

Posted on July 6, 2012 by lttlewys

Below is the post I wrote a few days ago and then held onto, rather than publishing right away. I was trying to find some sort of comfort level, some sort of way to deal. I realize, that I can at any time withdraw from the public, to say this is to much and y’all would understand, not only did I not understand what the full extent of what I was going to endure, in turn, I wasn’t able to see what being fully open would be. But, to stop now, would be too easy. And, y’all know, I hardly do things the easy way.

I have come to accept and even embrace my newfound baldness, at least mostly. It did take some time and even some tears!! Many of you have seen pics over the last few days of me out with friends, below find more!!

Today, for the first time, the reality of Cancer has set in. Before, I could ignore it, it wasn’t visible, I could cover the scars, will it away, sleep it away… pretend. Now, I look in the mirror and see the ravages it’s wrecked upon my body, I hear the rattle of multitudes of pills in my purse. I see the stares from people. I am uncomfortable and awkward to be out in public and the public is equally awkward and uncomfortable with me. .

A few days ago…. in two different conversations, I admitted not only the abject terror of going through chemo, and I am a total coward but also, the fact that I am so public about it. In one conversation, a friend asked if my writing about everything was cathertic. My answer “Hellz NO” in fact, it’s gut wrenching, to the point of humilating. To be so open about something so personal, something that not only affects me but my family and friends, is agonizing. I am so incredibly private and to bare everything in this way, to the world leaves me bleeding and gaping after each post, each comment.

Soooo, why?

I ask myself, every single day. I have started this and it must be done. It is as simple as that.

I did not foresee nor expect, that I would unravel before your eyes, that each post would be tortureous to pull from mind. That how I felt about myself would so completely affect… EVERYTHING! I feel guilty for whining about silly things, that are shallow and vain…. I hate myself for being the worlds biggest bitch to my bestest friends for no reason other than I am. Not that I am a bitch but it would appear that at times I become stark-raving-bitch for no other reason than someone trying to help!!

Y’all are wonderfully supportive and if occasionally it takes me a few days to update you, it’s coz I need some time to adjust, I need to step back, step away. I am taking a moment to try to understand what is me, what is the drugs and what is. I never meant for this cancer to be such a major factor in my life, my day to day, yet at every turn, every step, I feel it and ache with the changes I can see and feel. I didn’t and don’t want to define my life by this and yet, I see that I must. I must acknowledge the impact it is having, see the looks of my children as they watch and see the affects of their lives as well.

The looks of the strangers are just as bad. With some, I see looks of understanding and empathy as they recognize the visible port in my chest, the others just stare. Not unkindly, just awkwardly. Actually, there is a lot of awkward all the way round!! People not knowing what to say, people trying to say the right things and bumbling and even the uncomfortableness of those that don’t know what to say and are wondering in their heads if they even have to say anything!! Yes!! It’s ok to not say a thing, in fact, please let’s not talk about it. I never thought I would say this but I really am sick of talking about my bewbs. I don’t want you to be awkward or uncomfortable, do what feels right for you. If you need to talk about it, then let’s chat, if you see I am fine then leave it… I will warn you, if you are sneezy, coughy or even remotely looking Germy with Ick Cootie bugs, I’m probably not going to hug you!!

Sooo… as I promised, y’all sufficiently entertained me yesterday… here are new pics and will soon be on all my Avi’s across the board

Also, silver lining…. I won’t have to shave my legs all Summer!! That right there is soooo utterly awesome!

Out for Coffee!!

Workin on my Tan!!

Hanging with the fab Jure!!!

Posted in bewbluv, Breast Cancer, Cancer, Family, Friends, Parenting | Tagged #bewbluv, breast cancer | 38 Comments

Jun 27

Vanity Time-Out: A New List

Posted on June 27, 2012 by lttlewys

Sooo…. I should be telling you all about the cross journey trip we took, #WestmovesEast coz it totally rocked and was incredible and maybe about all neato stuff I’ve been doing since I’ve landed in NY and y’all are probably wondering about my bewbies…

That will all come later, for now I need your help!! I have started a list about all the wonderful things about being bald. You see, I knew it was coming and that it was going to happen. However, the knowing and the reality are kinda throwing off my groove thing!! Just to catch up, I shaved my head. When my hair started coming out in mass gobs that would put any hair ball to shame, I shaved it. No, there are no current pictures, there will be…. as soon as I get the cajones to take some.

Getting Shaved!! That's what's left of my hair....

It’s tru… I am taking a huge hit to my self esteem, to the way I carry myself and finding that it’s bugging me a lot more then I thought was possible. I mean, it’s freakin hair…it will grow back. So, while I struggle with the evil VANITY fairy that has attacked, can ya help me out??? Please add to or vote for the whys and haves of being bald!!

In return, I promise to take some uber cool pics and change all my avi’s and get ya’ll up to speed on the haps!!!

Good, Bad and the Bald

Listly by Brandie McCallum

Good, Bad and the Bald

Why is good or bad to be bald???

crowd rank
curated
alpha
newest
queue

Your eyes will be that much more striking.

Added by LisaDJenkins on Jun 27, 2012
7 0
$Don\'t have to drop $350.00 for haircut and colour$

Don\'t have to drop $350.00 for haircut and colour
6 0
$Doesn\'t take 45min to wash & style$

Doesn\'t take 45min to wash & style
6 0
I get to buy Groovy hats & wigs (YEA Shopping!!)
6 0
It's entirely possible you won't have to shave your legs - which means they'll be sexy smooth :)

Added by LisaDJenkins on Jun 27, 2012
6 0
Make A Wig for @SeanMcGinnis

Added by Sam Fiorella on Jun 27, 2012

Take the hair you've lost or cut and make a wig for Sean!! Or @josepf!! PLEASE
6 0
You can dress up as Evey Hammond every single day!

Added by LisaDJenkins on Jun 27, 2012

Directed by James McTeigue. With Hugo Weaving, Natalie Portman, Rupert Graves, Stephen Rea. A shadowy freedom fighter known only as "V" uses terrorist tactics to fight against his totalitarian society. Upon rescuing a girl from the secret police, he also finds his best chance at having an ally.
2 0
Your earrings will never be overlooked.

Added by LisaDJenkins on Jun 27, 2012
2 0
You get to look more like Ric Dragon and Josepf Haslam (sans the facial hair)

Added by sumner musolf on Jun 27, 2012
3 1
Rocking the Natalie Portman Look

Added by Steve Birkett on Jun 28, 2012

Own it, love it, be loved for it :)
1 0

View more lists from Brandie McCallum

Posted in bewbluv, Breast Cancer, Cancer, Community, Friends, Me, travel | Tagged #bewbluv, bald, breast cancer, hair | 36 Comments

Jun 13

It’s True, I Do Have Favourites!!

Posted on June 13, 2012 by lttlewys

My Chat Screen

A few weeks ago, I created a list with my top chats, these are chats that I frequent, hashtags I watch and yes, there are 50 of them. I was then challenged to cut that list down to 10!! *GASP* Not one to back away from a challenge, I promptly accepted.

The original list was selected based on my goals and my Social Strategy. They are chats that generally have topics that I can relate, too and find good business/life value from. The hosts/moderators run a great chat. The community built around the chat is generally really good and runs from Small Biz owners to Corporate Hounds.

In order, to narrow my list down and since I had already factored in the above criteria, I needed to bring in some other variables to cut my list down even further….

For Full disclosure… I have taken #BizForum, #SWChat and #CMGRHangout completely out of the running, since I am involved with them, it would seem like I was playing favs with Sam, David and Tim. Even though they are my fav’s and run great chats!!

After careful consideration, I have based the following selection of my favourite chats on the following:

No matter the topic, I am in the chat *Unless it’s about Pinterest, Sorry, just can’t have anymore chats about it*

Not only do they maintain their community, they continue to grow it and sustain it with fresh information. That means, I am meeting new people and learning more about the people in the chat each week. I love getting fresh perspectives, destroying my own perceptions and being challenged to think differently.

Lastly, I will be in the chat, coz I know the questions are informative, well thought out and the host/Moderator is agile enough to see the conversation swing in a way that doesn’t follow the script and is able to “roll with it” and ask additional questions. That being said, it’s ok to have your questions and want to maintain that conversation, yet it’s Twitter, you need to be able read your community and the audience. Entice out the lurkers!!

Soooo…. here are my 10 Chats:

#Blogchat- @MackCollier Sunday

#SocialChat- @Aknecht & @SocialMichelleR Monday 8pm EST

#InfluenceChat- @Berkson0 & @FredMcMillens Alternate Tues 12pm Est

#CustServ- @MarshaCollier & @JeffreyJKingman Tues 9pm EST

#GetRealChat- @PamMktNut Tues 9pm EST

#BrandChat- @BrandChat & @MariaDuron Wed 11am EST

#Tchat- @TalentCulture & @MeghanMBiro & Team Wed 7pm EST

#SMMeasure- @40Deuce Thurs 12pm EST

#HBRchat- @HBRexchange Thurs 1pm EST

#MediaChat- @Kilby76 Thurs 10pm EST

Those are my 10 chats….. it was harder than I thought to narrow my list down, mostly since I usually base my chats on topic and my own personal workload. I fully accept that I am a #ChatAddict and happily recommend chats to people, usually after asking a couple of questions. The above chats I would add to any list and or recommendation.

Much thanks to Collin for issuing this irresistible challenge!!

Posted in chat, marketing, Social Media, twitter | Tagged bizforum, blogchat, chat addict, swchat | 3 Comments

Page 1 of 2012 3 4 Next ›Last »

LTTLEWYS'S

Not Quite How I was Planning My Next Tattoo and #BewbLuv Moves Forward

The End of #BewbLuv… Sorta

Getting My Social Back via #NMX

Help Needed, Please Don’t Apply

Success…. Bittersweet and Awesome: A Mother’s Quandry

Not So Easy, Being Bald!!

Vanity Time-Out: A New List

Good, Bad and the Bald

Why is good or bad to be bald???

Your eyes will be that much more striking.

Don\'t have to drop $350.00 for haircut and colour

Doesn\'t take 45min to wash & style

I get to buy Groovy hats & wigs (YEA Shopping!!)

It's entirely possible you won't have to shave your legs - which means they'll be sexy smooth :)

Make A Wig for @SeanMcGinnis

You can dress up as Evey Hammond every single day!

Your earrings will never be overlooked.

You get to look more like Ric Dragon and Josepf Haslam (sans the facial hair)

Rocking the Natalie Portman Look

Want me to email you??

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